Friday, July 06, 2007

Random musings

I have no idea how it's possible to get your heart completely broken one moment and yet feel so utterly happy the next. And all with just a few words. One moment, so extremely miserable that you swear you have to extricate yourself from her so that maybe, just maybe your heart will heal, and yet you can't stay away. No matter how you try, no matter how desperately you want the freakin' roller coaster emotions to stop, there's still something in you that pulls you back. Then just as you harden your resolve, just as you finally manage to take a step away, she says a few words and you feel that something tug at your heart. Or sometimes, an unconscious caring gesture that floods you with such warmth and love, and you fall even deeper, willingly subjecting yourself to more hurt that you know is to come, contenting yourself with staying in the background, only surfacing when you're needed.

Ah well, i guess that's the perils of being so smitten. So fucking smitten...

And i can't decide if that's a good thing or not.

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